swestrup | Circular Memes.

I've done this meme before, but I wrote it, so I'm doing it again!

Meme Time Back at the Funny Farm

::BASICS
What is your name? Stirling Westrup
What is your quest? To live forever, or die trying.
To the nearest light year, how long is your world line? I figure it can't be much more than 42, unless I'm moving through dimensions unknown.
On a scale of one to ten, how Elvis are you? .06 -- This is an alarming increase since the last time I did this.
Are you housebroken? Yup.
Is your house broken? Oh yeah. Badly.
What color is your halo? Bronze?

::TEMPORALISING
When was the last time you had elbows? A few years, I think.
How often do you change your oil? I'm over due.
What is the next major task you plan to put off? Pooq website update.
In retrospect, how would you answer this question differently? Insightfully.
Whats the most recent thing that you can't remember? The name of several people I've met.
When did you last do something you weren't supposed to? That would be telling.
Did last Thursday happen, or is it a figment of your now? Man I hope its a figment.
Given an extra day in the week, where would you put it? Right in the middle of the weekend.

::ACTIVITIES
If gravity worked the other way, would you skydive? Maybe, if I had a long enough bungee.
If you had a favorite extreme sport, what would it be? Chronosynclastic Infandibularising.
Would you buy fractal Lego? Yup.
How many times have you nearly died? Dunno. None, I think.
How many times have you actually died? Every morning I seem to be reincarnated as me.
What's the tallest height you've jumped from? About 10 feet, I think.
Can you do a back flip in full plate mail? Yes, if you let me use a trebuchet.
Can you do a belly flop in full plate mail? Only once, if its into water.
What is the most fearsome animal you have ever stared down? Probably a dog.

::ESTHETICS
What piece of art do you most like, that your friends all hate? Half my music collection.
What is your favorite shoe size? Its still 3EEEEE -- You can wear it sideways!
What equation best models your taste in breakfast cereals? X^2 + Y^2 = Muselix.
What art project would you undertake, given the time and money? It would probably be something for the Long Now foundation.
Whats your favorite joke that no one gets? The human body.
What artistic endeavour are you most proficient at? Does procrastination count?
Name two art objects that would be improved by being fused together. "Nude Descending a Staircase" and "Plan 9 from Outer Space".

::WHATS MY PROBLEM
Have you ever been raped by saucer aliens? Is that what they were?
How many times? Every time.
When was the most recent occurance? Just then.
How many were there? That's a personal question.
Was one of them blue with orange tentacles? Yeah, unless it was the other way around.
Did it call itself Grzblat? It didn't deny it.
Do you know how to contact it? Climb to the top of Mount Rushmore and wave an encoded chicken.

::BODILY FUNCTIONS
Do any of your internal organs have nicknames? I'm sure they do, but they seldom talk to me.
Can you rotate your belly button? I'm doing it now.
Is the general trend in your body-part count increasing or decreasing? I forget the previous count.
Can you voluntarily dislocate any body parts? Does hair count?
Can you voluntarily disconnect any body parts? Sputum is a body part, right?
Which is your most dexterous orifice? Ha! I know the answer this time! My right ear!

::MENTATION
What is the stupidest thing you believe? That things will get arbitrarily better.
What is the most complex thing you find self evident? Evil is abnormal.
Explain why you wouldn't answer this if it were a question. But I would, just to mess with you.
How many thoughts can you think at once? Right now, almost one.
How few thoughts can you think at once? Right now, almost one.
How does your mental image differ from your actual one? It was formed when I was still a kid.
What do you do when thinking fails you? Vegetate.
If I run rings around you logically, does your penguin explode? I expect it does.
Are there any mental 'flaws' that you envy? certitude.

::EXISTENTIALISM
If you aren't real, how are you answering this? The unreal aren't necessary illiterate.
If you are real, why are you answering this? Because it is too.
If you were once real, who is answering this? Whatever is left.
What would 4 out of 5 of you recommend? A soak in a hot tub. 5 out of 5 would recommend sex.
What is your philosophy of being? Eternal life is more inviting if you like your own company.
What is your philosophy of non-being? Been there, done that.

::SOCIALISM
Describe your most embarrassing moment in the form of a question. Why do nude women cause me to spill beer all over myself?
Do your friends mind if you juggle knives? I sure hope so, because I'm awful at it.
Are there any excuses that you've worn out? Many.
What is the ratio of your friends to acquaintances? Very few to many.
If I give you chocolate, will you be my friend?

sps once gave me chocolate. It was amazing. The shop's not there any more though. I looked.
What is the largest group you feel socially comfortable in? A dozen or so, if its unstructured.
What is the most social group you feel largely comfortable in? An orgy. Who knew?

::SYNETHESIA
Can you hear with your eyes? Rarely.
Can you see with your ears? Yes, but not well.
Can you imagine the flavour of a walk in the autumn rain? Yes, easily.
What is the loudest color you can smell? I don't like to think about it, but its a shade of pink.
How long can you hold your taste? Just a few seconds.
What sounds make you cough? Scratchy ones. Reverberant ones.

::PONDERABLES
Name three impossible objects you would want with you on a deserted island. The Omniverse, A Universal Constructor, and a Tardis.
If you had a super power based on a platonic solid, an obscene gerund and a mythic object, what would it be? Travel through ethereal fucking spheres.
If you didn't know something that you do know, what would it be? Heartache.
If your remote control had only one button, why would that be? Because 'DWIW' is good enough.
If addition weren't commutative, what would shoes look like? They would no longer be rotationally invariant.
Why did you answer these questions? A vain hope that others would follow suit.