Networking -- The other kind.
Jul. 23rd, 2005 01:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
swestrupSo, a bit more than a week ago, I was in the middle of my shifting-the-hours around thing (which, much to my amazement, is still holding) and working to try and restore a deadish web server. The result was that it was something like 6:00 am, and I had been up since just before midnight, trying to fix the thing.
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taxlady reminded me that she was going to check out Networking + Plus, a local business networking group. They have a fortnightly 7:00 am breakfast get together, and I decided to tag along. She had gone to a cocktail event that they had held earlier and described it as rather laid-back and informal. You essentially just wondered around asking folks what they do, and telling them what you do, and exchanging business cards. The idea is that if either of you ever discover yourself in need of (or know someone in need of) the other persons services, you would already have a convenient contact. So, I decided to tag along.
The breakfast is held not very far from our house, although it would be a bit of a pain to get to if I had to take a bus. Anyway, we attended the breakfast as guests ($15 fee each) since we hadn't decided to join (and still haven't, for that matter).
Now, I have mentioned in the past that I have problems with shyness and so going to a networking social is a bit of a traumatic experience for me at the best of times, but I figured it was time to deliberately stretch the envelope of what I'm comfortable with. The breakfast did that for sure -- in spades.
There were the usual problems of being new to a venue that everyone is already familiar with. So, everyone else knows whats going on, and what will happen next, while I had no clue. This makes for a rather nervous Sti. Then, it turns out that the breakfasts are a lot more structured than the cocktails, and so there are consequences of attending them. Here's how it all worked out:
First, we go pay our fees and hand the man at the door two business cards each (good thing I thought to bring some). We then go through a very simple buffet line to get our breakfasts (not much more on offer than scrambled eggs, bacon and sausage). We take our breakfasts to one of about a dozen large round tables, each of which can seat about 10 people. We proceed to eat breakfast while making small talk.
So far its about as I expected, except when I ask about getting seconds from the buffet (after all, this was my supper). No one at the table had ever gotten seconds and didn't know if I was supposed to get a new plate or not, or where to get rid of the old plate if one was supposed to take a new one. Suddenly I'm feeling like an outsider again. I manage to work it out though.
Secondly, while I'm eating seconds, and trying to chat with the folks at the table with me, the MC gets up and announces that we are going to go around the tables and each person will have no more than 30 seconds to say who they are, what their company is, and what they do. This paralyzes me. Now, I'm not afraid to speak in public (strangely enough) but I have NO IDEA how I am supposed to describe Pooq in 30 seconds (since I had Pooq business cards with me, not personal ones), and I certainly didn't come prepared to do this.
Luckily it turns out that our table will be last and, as it turns out, I will be one of the last to speak at our table. I spend the next 20 minutes ignoring everyone else's speeches and mentally preparing one of my own. Halfway through this process I realize that something else is going on.
After each person makes a speech, they pull a business card out of a hat. That hat contains one of the business cards that each person hands over at the door. You then announce the person who's card you've pulled out and are expected to make an appointment to see that person for a couple of hours sometime in the following week. The idea is that you can have a long talk and try to find out if there is any way that your business and theirs can do any good for each other or for each other's clients.
Well, I eventually make my speech, which I can't remember at all, but which I am told was not too stupid, so that's okay. Before that point, someone who does personal financial planning had already pulled my card from the hat, and I pulled out the card of someone who does reflexology/shiatsu/acupressure and various new-age treatments.
So, having survived one unexpected social trauma, I was suddenly faced with two more. I didn't WANT to have to make appointments with two complete strangers, but I gritted my teeth and decided I would go through with what was expected of me.
That wasn't the end of it though. Next the MC said we would have some sort of brainstorming session at our tables. Todays topic was 'How to attract business during the lean summer months'. We had 10 minutes for everyone at each table to come up with a few suggestions, which someone at the table would write down. Then each table would have their notetaker stand up and read the list of suggestions. This was actually a pretty good idea, and I would have enjoyed it, except thattaxlady and I never heard the MC since we were talking to the folks that had pulled our cards from the hat. So, we completely misunderstood what was going on.
Finally, the MC announced that one person was going to give an 8-minute talk on what their company did. The person who had prepared a spiel this time around was the Reflexology lady, who's name I had pulled. She gave her little 8-minute presentation during which she came across as nice, sweet, sincere and a total nutjob. Luckily she seems used to being percieved as a nutjob and doesn't mind folks who display outright scepticism (as I did).
The meeting broke up then, but we spent some time chatting with some of the folks who genuinely had interests that coincided with ours. That included a man from ReBOOT Montreal, and a Lady who runs PubNIX.net, an ISP that has been around longer than the Web, and with whom it appears we shared many old friends.
After the meeting, I made an appointment with the Shiatsu lady for the following Monday, and an appointment with the Personal Financial Manger on the Tuesday, so my social trauma could continue...
Monday, I saw the Shiatsu lady at her office in Baie D'Urfe and we talked about what we each did. It turns out she knows someone who has a microwave telecom company, and suggested I might try sending my CV there, so demonstrating that you never know WHO might have useful contacts. Anyway, after we chatted for a bit, she gave me a 30-minute demonstration of acupressure, Shiatsu and Reflexology. I don't think I'm in her target audience though. I did my best to partipate fully, so that I could at least say I had given it a chance, but all I came away with were bruises on my neck. I couldn't help but think, while she was working on my head, that the one head massage thatazrhey once gave me was worlds more soothing and calming than what this lady does.
Tuesday, I visited with the financial planner lady at a Second Cup nearby. We hit it right off and chatted happily for about 2.5 hours. I'm not sure that she can do much for someone like me, who has no income, but she certainly seemed like someone I would want to talk to if I were working full time. In addition, while I was trying to demonstrate the ways that Pooq comes up with new approaches to old business problems, I mentioned to her my old idea of having a personal financial simulator program developped that they could give away. This would allow their clients to try various scenarios and find out for themselves how well the different financial planning ideas worked. She was interested, and said she'd suggest it to her umbrella corp, in case they want to go with it. Once again, we see how this might lead to possible business.
Last Thursday, the networking group had another of their cocktail socials, and I decided to go along, and see what's what at them. At leasttaxlady had been to one of those before and could assure me that they were unstructured and I wouldn't end up with outside obligations. This turned out to be the case. It also turned out that I have been pushing this socializing too much and didn't really want to talk to anyone there, but to hide in a corner and vanish. It didn't help that I ran out of Business cards half-way through the thing. (Note to self: must redesign business card. Most folks were completely baffled by the current design. Could not distinguish my name from the company's name from my title. *sigh*)
I did end up talking to someone who told me that they were thinking of starting a small internet business now that they had 'retired' and was looking for the right sorts to help him out. I gave him one of my cards before they all ran out, and I may eventually hear from him, though I tend to doubt it.
In the end, I find myself of two minds about the whole thing. On the one hand, I find it very difficult to force myself to be sociable in this way, and I'm not sure what ultimate good will come from it. On the other hand, this is giving me experience in meeting new folks and in trying to sell myself, skills that I certainly lack.
taxlady reminded me that she was going to check out Networking + Plus, a local business networking group. They have a fortnightly 7:00 am breakfast get together, and I decided to tag along. She had gone to a cocktail event that they had held earlier and described it as rather laid-back and informal. You essentially just wondered around asking folks what they do, and telling them what you do, and exchanging business cards. The idea is that if either of you ever discover yourself in need of (or know someone in need of) the other persons services, you would already have a convenient contact. So, I decided to tag along.The breakfast is held not very far from our house, although it would be a bit of a pain to get to if I had to take a bus. Anyway, we attended the breakfast as guests ($15 fee each) since we hadn't decided to join (and still haven't, for that matter).
Now, I have mentioned in the past that I have problems with shyness and so going to a networking social is a bit of a traumatic experience for me at the best of times, but I figured it was time to deliberately stretch the envelope of what I'm comfortable with. The breakfast did that for sure -- in spades.
There were the usual problems of being new to a venue that everyone is already familiar with. So, everyone else knows whats going on, and what will happen next, while I had no clue. This makes for a rather nervous Sti. Then, it turns out that the breakfasts are a lot more structured than the cocktails, and so there are consequences of attending them. Here's how it all worked out:
First, we go pay our fees and hand the man at the door two business cards each (good thing I thought to bring some). We then go through a very simple buffet line to get our breakfasts (not much more on offer than scrambled eggs, bacon and sausage). We take our breakfasts to one of about a dozen large round tables, each of which can seat about 10 people. We proceed to eat breakfast while making small talk.
So far its about as I expected, except when I ask about getting seconds from the buffet (after all, this was my supper). No one at the table had ever gotten seconds and didn't know if I was supposed to get a new plate or not, or where to get rid of the old plate if one was supposed to take a new one. Suddenly I'm feeling like an outsider again. I manage to work it out though.
Secondly, while I'm eating seconds, and trying to chat with the folks at the table with me, the MC gets up and announces that we are going to go around the tables and each person will have no more than 30 seconds to say who they are, what their company is, and what they do. This paralyzes me. Now, I'm not afraid to speak in public (strangely enough) but I have NO IDEA how I am supposed to describe Pooq in 30 seconds (since I had Pooq business cards with me, not personal ones), and I certainly didn't come prepared to do this.
Luckily it turns out that our table will be last and, as it turns out, I will be one of the last to speak at our table. I spend the next 20 minutes ignoring everyone else's speeches and mentally preparing one of my own. Halfway through this process I realize that something else is going on.
After each person makes a speech, they pull a business card out of a hat. That hat contains one of the business cards that each person hands over at the door. You then announce the person who's card you've pulled out and are expected to make an appointment to see that person for a couple of hours sometime in the following week. The idea is that you can have a long talk and try to find out if there is any way that your business and theirs can do any good for each other or for each other's clients.
Well, I eventually make my speech, which I can't remember at all, but which I am told was not too stupid, so that's okay. Before that point, someone who does personal financial planning had already pulled my card from the hat, and I pulled out the card of someone who does reflexology/shiatsu/acupressure and various new-age treatments.
So, having survived one unexpected social trauma, I was suddenly faced with two more. I didn't WANT to have to make appointments with two complete strangers, but I gritted my teeth and decided I would go through with what was expected of me.
That wasn't the end of it though. Next the MC said we would have some sort of brainstorming session at our tables. Todays topic was 'How to attract business during the lean summer months'. We had 10 minutes for everyone at each table to come up with a few suggestions, which someone at the table would write down. Then each table would have their notetaker stand up and read the list of suggestions. This was actually a pretty good idea, and I would have enjoyed it, except that
taxlady and I never heard the MC since we were talking to the folks that had pulled our cards from the hat. So, we completely misunderstood what was going on.Finally, the MC announced that one person was going to give an 8-minute talk on what their company did. The person who had prepared a spiel this time around was the Reflexology lady, who's name I had pulled. She gave her little 8-minute presentation during which she came across as nice, sweet, sincere and a total nutjob. Luckily she seems used to being percieved as a nutjob and doesn't mind folks who display outright scepticism (as I did).
The meeting broke up then, but we spent some time chatting with some of the folks who genuinely had interests that coincided with ours. That included a man from ReBOOT Montreal, and a Lady who runs PubNIX.net, an ISP that has been around longer than the Web, and with whom it appears we shared many old friends.
After the meeting, I made an appointment with the Shiatsu lady for the following Monday, and an appointment with the Personal Financial Manger on the Tuesday, so my social trauma could continue...
Monday, I saw the Shiatsu lady at her office in Baie D'Urfe and we talked about what we each did. It turns out she knows someone who has a microwave telecom company, and suggested I might try sending my CV there, so demonstrating that you never know WHO might have useful contacts. Anyway, after we chatted for a bit, she gave me a 30-minute demonstration of acupressure, Shiatsu and Reflexology. I don't think I'm in her target audience though. I did my best to partipate fully, so that I could at least say I had given it a chance, but all I came away with were bruises on my neck. I couldn't help but think, while she was working on my head, that the one head massage that
azrhey once gave me was worlds more soothing and calming than what this lady does. Tuesday, I visited with the financial planner lady at a Second Cup nearby. We hit it right off and chatted happily for about 2.5 hours. I'm not sure that she can do much for someone like me, who has no income, but she certainly seemed like someone I would want to talk to if I were working full time. In addition, while I was trying to demonstrate the ways that Pooq comes up with new approaches to old business problems, I mentioned to her my old idea of having a personal financial simulator program developped that they could give away. This would allow their clients to try various scenarios and find out for themselves how well the different financial planning ideas worked. She was interested, and said she'd suggest it to her umbrella corp, in case they want to go with it. Once again, we see how this might lead to possible business.
Last Thursday, the networking group had another of their cocktail socials, and I decided to go along, and see what's what at them. At least
taxlady had been to one of those before and could assure me that they were unstructured and I wouldn't end up with outside obligations. This turned out to be the case. It also turned out that I have been pushing this socializing too much and didn't really want to talk to anyone there, but to hide in a corner and vanish. It didn't help that I ran out of Business cards half-way through the thing. (Note to self: must redesign business card. Most folks were completely baffled by the current design. Could not distinguish my name from the company's name from my title. *sigh*)I did end up talking to someone who told me that they were thinking of starting a small internet business now that they had 'retired' and was looking for the right sorts to help him out. I gave him one of my cards before they all ran out, and I may eventually hear from him, though I tend to doubt it.
In the end, I find myself of two minds about the whole thing. On the one hand, I find it very difficult to force myself to be sociable in this way, and I'm not sure what ultimate good will come from it. On the other hand, this is giving me experience in meeting new folks and in trying to sell myself, skills that I certainly lack.
