Unfriending.

[swestrup]

Bleah. I'm unfriending kayleighb. I like reading her journal and all, and occassionally post comments when I have something relevant to contribute. Lately though she's been harassed by some psycho chick who keeps posting weird comments in kayleighb's journal. As a result all commenting has been turned off for non-friends and she's never friended me. Since I can't stand one-sided conversations, I'm going to unfriend her as well, so I don't end up wanting to post a comment, which I can't do.

This seems a major flaw in LJ's system. In order to keep someone else from being obnoxious, she's had to take action which has prevented a number of other folks from being able to interact with her. This sucks.

Comments

[swestrup]

I have never heard of ban_set, and I don't think she has either. And now there's no way to tell her that there was another way.

[thebabynancy.livejournal.com]

Uhm, as a former kayleighb friend... trust me when I say that it's better to let her do what she wants while she is going thru what she is going thru. She's a good person. She's just got some issues. I really wouldn't press it. :)

[swestrup]

Yeah, I'd already come to that conclusion. I don't even blame her. I blame LJ.

[thebabynancy.livejournal.com]

I don't know if one can fault LJ... I mean it happens everywhere online, regardless of the individual theme, or function of the site. People abuse one another... regardless of the medium.

[swestrup]

Then let me be more specific: I blame the makers of LJ for not having realized these sorts of things would happen and for not having taken steps to prevent or mitigate the problem. Their entire 'friends' and filtering system has serious problems and should have been much better thought out.

[thebabynancy.livejournal.com]

Of course they knew these things would happen!

Long before LJ - there were online stalkers. Long after LJ - there will be said stalkers.

It's nice that one can control who reads what, and what one reads. One cannot, however, control everything...

I think I understand what you are saying... and I dunno if you've ever been so unfortunate as to have someone turn psycho online towards you... it's not fun, to say the least. But, I don't think any amount of planning - be it individual or on the onus of a particular website can control stalkerish behaviour.

It can only impede it.

[swestrup]

Actually, I know of a number of things that would make it virtually impossible. NWO for one. But I wouldn't expect the folks at LJ to have invented NWO. I WOULD expect them to build a better friends system.

I could. It would be simpler to use, and make it much harder for psycho stalkers. What's more, it would do far less damage to innocent bystanders...

[kay.livejournal.com]

Not sure what NWO is?

[swestrup]

> Not sure what NWO is?

Not surprising. NWO is short for 'New Web Order' and is the code name for a product that _sps_, me and a non-LJ'er came up with a design for. You could think of it as The Web V2.0, and it would replace HTML, TCP/IP and most of the other underpinnings of the current web with stuff that actually works. Most of the parts of the design have shown up in various proposals around the web, but I think we're the first folks who've woven them all together and figured out how to make it work.

That said, its only a design at the moment. Much as I would love to see it put into place (it would eliminate spam, for instance), we haven't been able to interest anyone in funding its development.

Still, if the project I'm working on now proves profitable, it could help fund some of the development.

[kay.livejournal.com]

Issues huh? Wow .. I had no idea you took it so personal that I removed you from my list. It really wasn't meant personal, just an lj thing.

[thebabynancy.livejournal.com]

Nah I did not take it personally, nor do I currently have a beef with it. :)

I was pointing out to swestrup that the stalker issues (I should have clarified that - sometimes I type too fast) were the cause, and nothing more... and when you sorted that out, all would be well. Didn't mean to make it seem like anything other than that sweetie... honest. :)

*hugs*

:) Nancy

[kay.livejournal.com]

Ohkay .. was not entire sure how you meant it, sorry ... gotcha now :)

[thebabynancy.livejournal.com]

np, hope all is well in your part of the world and that you are enjoying Spring! :) *hugs*

[kay.livejournal.com]

Everyuthing fine here ... aside from some teenage barbie girl stalkers :) Cleaning my first spring days away I'm afraid ::sigh::

[thebabynancy.livejournal.com]

Yeah stalkers aren't fun - online or IRL... wish there was a better way to filter and/or hinder them... LJ sucks in that respect.

Was sad to hear that you were going thru something so vile.

Cleaning? That's what Spring is for... get all the dust bunnies and cobwebs cleared away... not like your place isn't immaculate... from the pictures I've seen. :)

'tis rainy here in Montreal... 'tis very pretty though.

*hugs*

[kay.livejournal.com]

I was pointed to your posting ... sorry man, never dawned on me that by trying to get rid of a few psycho's I excluded a lot of people from commenting. So will add you ... I definitely agree on the lj flaw .. your hands are tied on lj when things like this happen when you can't filter out one or two people who are harrassing bu in stead are forced to take out an entire group.

[swestrup]

Thanks! I really didn't like the idea of unfriending you. I've been enjoying reading about your daily exploits, your pets and your various Atkins recipies. (My wife taxlady and I will be trying out Atkins next month, right after her birthday.)