My Own Urban Legend.

[swestrup]

There once was a society lad who went to an avant guard vernissage and drank far too much of the free champagne. Its likely that at some point some evil surrealists spiked his drink, since he awoke in a bathtub full of liver pate, wearing nothing but a neon-yellow tutu. When he examined himself in the mirror, he discovered that someone had tattooed rubber ducks all over his body.

DON'T LET THIS HAPPEN TO YOU!