I don't get schadenfreude. Its not an emotion that I ever feel. I have to admit though, that sometimes I feel dismay at a friend's good luck. I can't decide if that's just as bad, or not.
No, I don't get it either. Well, I suppose I've come to appreciate the fun that can be had in an RPG when things go wrong for someone's character, but I doubt that's related because it applies equally to my character.
I have wondered about that. It seems to general for me. Anyone's misfortue? No. I am sad at most people's misfortunes and wish I could help.
On the other hand I am a child of the Mediterranean. We hold grudges. WE sometimes forgive but never forget. When a "friend"in Portugal learnt her husband was cheating on her I was glad, she had after all tried to steal my boyfriend when we were 12 or 13. I am polite with her but we despise eachother and each bad news we hear is like a sweet sweet balm. But it is a specific case, there are a couple of others like that. There is a man alive that I wish were dead. He is dying from cancer in fact. I wish him lots of pain. And yes when I am told how much he suffers from his stomac cancer I feel all warm inside. I know he will never suffer enough, not as much as he caused the rest of the family. So yeah in these circunstances I understand that.
But not the general feeling. I sent a card when that man's new wife got sick. It is unfortunate we don't deal with her more and it pains meto learn she is not very healthy and had problems with her own sons. I will be sad for her when he dies because she has been with him for about 20 years and all. But I will be as glad to go and spit on his grave...
It is a complicated matter for me. Sometimes I wish I were more zen about some things, cold hearted anglo-saxon-germanic or cool and composed scandinavian, but it is what I am and there is nothing I can do about it.
I don't understand s-f (I don't feel like spelling it - too long) or how people can actually be drawn in by it. I'm the opposite way: almost always feel compassion for someone who is going through tough times.
OTOH, feeling dismay (or whatever emotion you want to assign to it) at a friend's good luck is simply envy. As long as you don't meander into wishing it had never happened to them, you're okay. You just wish it had happened to you.
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I am sad at most people's misfortunes and wish I could help.
On the other hand I am a child of the Mediterranean. We hold grudges. WE sometimes forgive but never forget. When a "friend"in Portugal learnt her husband was cheating on her I was glad, she had after all tried to steal my boyfriend when we were 12 or 13. I am polite with her but we despise eachother and each bad news we hear is like a sweet sweet balm. But it is a specific case, there are a couple of others like that. There is a man alive that I wish were dead. He is dying from cancer in fact. I wish him lots of pain. And yes when I am told how much he suffers from his stomac cancer I feel all warm inside. I know he will never suffer enough, not as much as he caused the rest of the family. So yeah in these circunstances I understand that.
But not the general feeling. I sent a card when that man's new wife got sick. It is unfortunate we don't deal with her more and it pains meto learn she is not very healthy and had problems with her own sons. I will be sad for her when he dies because she has been with him for about 20 years and all. But I will be as glad to go and spit on his grave...
It is a complicated matter for me. Sometimes I wish I were more zen about some things, cold hearted anglo-saxon-germanic or cool and composed scandinavian, but it is what I am and there is nothing I can do about it.
:)
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OTOH, feeling dismay (or whatever emotion you want to assign to it) at a friend's good luck is simply envy. As long as you don't meander into wishing it had never happened to them, you're okay. You just wish it had happened to you.
Poor (hah!) but happy hugs,
H.
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Thank you, Avenue Q!!!
Perhaps this will clarify why people appreciate it (lyrics NSFW — some of the visuals are questionable, too).
Re: Thank you, Avenue Q!!!
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